It's real

I, and others like me, have been called Stepford wives.  For those of you who aren't into 70's movies, these are artificial women who do all-things-domestic "perfectly".  Perfect house, perfect grooming, perfect cooking, perfect wife.  On the surface, they appear ..... perfect.  But, as the story goes, it's all an illusion and underneath is an enslaved feminist in major denial and, deep down, seething with resentment.  At the same time, ironically, they are highly judgmental of fellow SWs who dare to break from the mold.

Members of my faith sometimes appear to be Stepford-ish.  For example, can anyone BE more perfect than Ann Romney?  The worst the media can dig up about the family was that they once strapped their dog carrier on the roof of their car.  (Every dog I've ever known would have begged for such a ride!)

So why the SW label?  I think it boils down to what SOME perceive to be choice, or the lack thereof.   In other words, since THEY didn't make good choices, the good choices were never really available.  And anyone who APPEARS to have made good choices, cannot be real.

A few examples of good choices:

> Saving sex for marriage then remaining completely faithful for life.

> Avoiding addictive substances like tobacco, liquor, illegal drugs, etc.  Not to mention other forms of sabotage such as immoral movies, pornography, immodesty, foul language, and toxic people.

> Going to church and when you get there -- listening.

> Getting educated and then working so that no one else has to clean up your mess or pick up your tab.

Some think they did not have some or any of these choices.  But that's a lie.  Life may have obscured the options, but we are not ruled by the Taliban, nor are we wearing burkas.  In this society, we have choices.

And even if we make good choices, there are few guarantees.  Ann Romney didn't escape some life-threatening illnesses.  BUT there are odds.  And the odds are, with the right choices, that life will be better.  You will be happier.  Your children will be happier.  And the world will be a little better.

I didn't start out any smarter than anyone else, but FORTUNATELY my parents made good choices that placed me, right from the get-go, into a religion that taught me to avoid potholes.  The outside world says it's not possible ... it's not realistic ... we are only human and those potholes are part of life.

But not my life.

They say, for example, teenagers WILL have sex, so stop denying it and break out the birth control.  Yet many of us didn't.  We chose to wait.

STDs and unwed pregnancies were not part of my world.  Neither were single parenting, fatherless children, and the related dependence on public assistance.  Also foreign to my world is drunkenness and substance addictions.  Good choices ARE possible ....  I see it in my world all the time.  KIDS NEED TO KNOW THIS and it's our job as adults, to SHOW them ......

... that it's not an illusion.  Those good choices, with the better odds and happier life, can be theirs.

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Added note:  With that religion that saved me and countless others from the potholes, comes the knowledge that mistakes and poor choices of varying degrees can and do happen to all of us.  The Bible teaches us the solution.  It's called repentance.